I have been asked this week what we are doing to celebrate Marky’s. 18th birthday. What I can tell you, without a doubt, is there will be ice cream cake.
It has been an interesting few weeks leading up t0 this. There are things that need to get done that you just never think about until “you are in it”.
Leading up to this birthday, we have had to:
- work with a lawyer to create a special needs trust, along with other legal aspects that I will be witting about to share, as I feel it will be helpful to many
- work with our bank to make sure his account has no fees taken out due to him being 18
- work with the county to fill out more papers and arrange a video to have him interviewed
- get ready to apply for SSI as he will now be eligible
- prepare paperwork to allow the school to communicate with me
Where is the fun in all of this? What about the party ? It is all so different than what I know from my other children. It is mentally draining and when I think about it all, it just is too much. Yes, we knew the day was coming, yes, we have to do it, but it doesn’t make it any easier to process.
I said to a friend last week, that I am getting through it by forgetting I am his mom and remembering he needs my voice, I try to remove all emotion and get my ” I am his advocate hat on” .
Am I having success ? At moments.
Am I getting through it? Yes
Do I wish I could blink and have it all done? Absolutely.
I realize I am fortunate in that Marky is a young man who likes to please, he goes with the flow and can use his words to talk to me. Many parents may not have that. I also know he does not understand what I am doing for him, nor does he realize what it all means. Maybe that is ok . Maybe that makes it a little easier ? I don’t know.
What I do know, is on Sunday, we will have ice cream cake .
I will focus on that for now.
This is day 4 of my writing challenge I gave to myself. All pics are from his “senior pics” . Each one makes me smile.