To be happy, to have fun, to learn, to sing, to talk with their kids, they are all expectations of every mother. No one would say that these are hard things to do, but for a mom of a child with autism, it isn´t that easy. For two years I’ve been struggling with communication and some behavior issues with my little 4 years old boy with autism.
As a family, we tried to go to the movies several times, but we failed. Me or my husband had to go outside the theater because our baby was noisy, or anxious, or trying to eat someone else´s popcorn or soda. We tried to keep him in a regular school, but some misses declared incapable to keep him, so we had to make changes. We tried to teach him to say some words, but he just brings what he wants or pushes us to get it. That made us feel frustrated, angry and worried. We started to visit specialists, to test him, and spending more time and money trying to find out what was wrong with him. At the beginning, we saw those expectations falling down. We stopped to try for a while.
However, after researching and meeting new people, we realized that we can still be happy, learn, sing, communicate, and have fun with him and his brother. And guess what? It’s not that difficult now! I mean, we cannot do everything as we want it, but we try to find new ways that works for him and for us. For now, we don’t go to the movies together, my husband and I take turns to go with our oldest boy and the other stays home eating popcorn with Andy. We looked for therapy institutions and special needs schools from the government in order to not to spend money we don’t have, and still help our boy. We enjoy doing those activities he enjoys like swimming, running, riding bikes, and jumping. We can go to restaurants or some other public places carrying an electronic device with us so he can watch his favorite series, and songs as well as play educational games. We can travel longer distances and change the route being aware of his emotions and mood. We can buy enough food he likes so he can eat well. And, of course, we can talk to people around us about how important it is their help. All these adjustments have made us notice how much happier our baby boy is. In conclusion, we can still be happy. Not only BE HAPPY IN SPITE OF our circumstances, but BECAUSE of them.
I´m happy when looks at me and, even though he doesn´t speak, he lets me know how much he loves me. I’m happy when he dares to do something new, and he learns. I’m happy to know more than before, to be more human, to be wiser, and stronger than ever. I believe in Happiness. This is our life, this is what we have, and what we love. I just would want it other way.
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